Ashley's Story

She will leave fingerprints all over your heart

9/17/2010

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Allison Brooke - Homecoming 2010
7th grade

Being home allows me to be here for moments like this...



Blake and Allison - Homecoming 2010
Freshman Year

and this...


and you can't replace this time in their lives.

Tonight as I tuck my littlest one into bed, chat for an hour with my middle one, and wait up for my oldest one to make it back home safely, I am reminded what a blessed life I live. To have these three children in my life is the most amazing gift. Being their mom and seeing the smiles on their faces means more to me than any thing else. I love this part of my life. I absolutely love it.


Dave and I slipped out to the football game for a little while tonight. We didn't stay the entire time because Ashley Kate needed to have her TPN hung, but the normalcy of the evening was nice. Sitting among other parents, our kids running around with their friends, and just enjoying what all of our peers do on a regular Friday night in Texas. I have moments where I find myself staring at the people around us and feeling like we no longer belong with them or anywhere for that matter. Its such a weird feeling. Its like we live in a different place than most and very few have any idea where that place is. I don't know how to explain it, but it only lasts a few moments and then I snap back in to where I am and I breathe a sigh of relief. Normal life. Enjoy it for now, I know things are going to be very different for us soon.

Anyway, it was nice to feel normal. If even for a couple of hours. It was nice. The only thing that could have made it better for us was to have our 5 year old there with us sporting a big blue and gold Pine Tree Pirate hair bow, but its not to be this year. Maybe next, just not this year.


Tomorrow we get to enjoy watching Allison play soccer then we will spend our afternoon watching Blake play baseball. My mom came into town last week to sit with Ash and allow me to attend Blake and Allie's activities. Such a blessing to be allowed to be present with them during this time that I am home. Ash is not to a place where she can be on the go with us and to know that she is safe and well cared for in our home is nice. I'm so thankful to have some help. So thankful. Its so important for us to spend time with the older kids. Being home this time is different. Its not a feeling of if we have to go back to Omaha haunting me, but knowing that yes we are going back is haunting to me. Time with Blake and Allie is so very important. I will be missing so much of their lives next year. I wouldn't trade these days we all have to spend together for anything. I just wouldn't.

Hope you all enjoy your weekends. Thanks for sticking with us. Your all such a blessing to Dave and I. We truly appreciate your prayers and your support. Good night.

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