Ashley's Story

She will leave fingerprints all over your heart

12/28/2008

Our Fairytale has ended...

...and tonight our princess rests not in the glow of the castle and all of its magic, but under the glow from the lines on the monitor once again. Its just not much fun coming back to reality, but the magic and memories we have made will be cherished for a lifetime.

We're here. The flight was a little longer than it usually is. I guess Florida is farther away from Nebraska than Texas. Anyway, it was a good trip. Ash and I are really exhausted. We've had little to no sleep(except for the naps we took on the flight) for the last couple of days. She is currently in PICU, but we are hoping for a quick transfer to the floor. Tonight or in the morning? She looks good and is laying in bed crying for her, "bu, bu, bu, bubba". More labs have been sent and cultures drawn. We'll just have to wait and see what the next few days will look like. If she is septic(which currently she doesn't present that way) then it could get really ugly. I'm praying its not the case.

Dave and the kids had an amazing day. We decided to keep things on schedule and just allow Ash and I to have our trip interrupted. I'm so glad we did this. Although they are concerned for Ashley Kate they managed to continue having a wonderful time and nothing made my heart happier than to listen to them ramble on and on about all they were experiencing. I love them so, so much and this is not what we had hoped would happen, but it is our reality. Its just the way life works for our family and we are rolling with it the best that we can. They have another day and 1/2 left in Florida and then will be arriving to our home in Texas sometime in the late evening hours on Tuesday. Seizing the opportunity to make more memories with the kids is exactly what Dave is doing and I wouldn't have it any other way. He promised to make some more magic with them and I know he will. I'm so thankful they have him when I'm forced to be away.

I'm just to tired to think much tonight. Omaha. Its not my favorite place, but it is familiar. Much more comforting than the halls of the hospital in Orlando where I knew no one and had no support. There were some amazing nurses and I'm thankful for the job they did, but knowing we have friends here in our hospital makes life more "doable" for me. Tomorrow we will start on the path to healing and recovery again. I'm hoping we can do a little better job of it this time and perhaps have the opportunity to make it home for a long while.

I'm going to settle in to the familiarity of my recliner and try to grab a few moments of sleep. Your prayers are greatly appreciated. Good night my friends.

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