Some Days

Have you ever had one of those days when nothing seems to go right? Everything I planned to do today did not get done. Everything I attempted failed. All of my efforts were in vain as I bobbled from one task to another to another. By evening I decide to chunk all of my plans and just have a little fun doing something I hadn't done since last summer. A little game of basketball is just what I needed. So the teams were chosen and the whistle blew. Blake decided to take on me and Allie. I reminded him as he made shot after shot that I would tell him when I had won and the game would be over. He laughed and swooshed another past me. Even though my good intentions went by the way side, my day ended doing the most important thing I could have done. Hanging out with my kids and showing them that they were more important than that to do list.

I hope that tomorrow will be a better day for Ash as well. Today she has struggled. She has been vomiting for most of it and has not taken more than a ten minute nap. Each time she drifts off to sleep she begins to vomit again. She has been through more blankets and outfits today then she has all week. Nothing has been left unsoiled(including her daddy). She is happy, just having some yucky side effects. No fever, no stooling out, no other symptoms to cause me to panic or feel alarmed. Tomorrow we will be in Dallas for another round of chemo. She will also begin her 5 day stretch of very high dose steroids. I dread the next five days for her. When she receives the steroid at this level it makes her miserable. She gets grumpy and irritable. She becomes inconsolable and acts like she wants to crawl out of her skin. One of our oncologist told us to prepare to lose our hair along with Ash. Hers will fall out and ours will be pulled out because of the 5 day stretch of prednisone. I thought that tomorrow would be a short day at Children's, but they called this evening and told me she would be there approximately 6 to 7 hours. When you add another 5 hours of driving to that it makes for a really tough day for my Ashley. I am praying that she will be worn out from her lack of rest today and that she might sleep through most of tomorrow. That would be such a blessing.

To top of all of the things that went wrong today as I prepared to give meds and "plug" Ash in tonight I realized that I accidentally combined 2 different meds into one bottle when I thought I was combining two of the same trying to make more room in her med bag for the trip tomorrow. I just shook my head and thought to myself,"It just seems right that its not going to stop until I lay down and put an end to this day." When it came time to plug in Ash's feeding pump to charge the battery while we slept I realized that I left it in at Nans while working at the house today. While I was telling Dave about all the things that happened through out the day Blake spoke up and added, "and the Rangers lost too so add that to the list!" Now I get it, our beloved Texas Rangers have lost 3 games in a row and that is why the world is out of sorts for us. It is all beginning to make sense.

Needless to say I am ready to end this one and start fresh tomorrow. Dave and Ash are already in bed, but instead of sleeping I can hear them playing. I think its going to be a long night. Thanks so much for praying for us today. I would appreciate any prayers you would send to the Father for Ash tomorrow as she goes back to attack those cancer cells. I try to imagine the tumors shrinking as we sit and wait for her infusions to end. Good night. Trish