Ashley's Story

She will leave fingerprints all over your heart



I'm watching Ashley Kate play this morning. Something I sat and grieved the loss of many times this past summer as she lay so still, so lost, so gone from us. I wondered many, many times if she would ever have the strength or the desire to return to her silly, playful self. I cried huge tears as I missed her messes, her noise, her laughter. God is so, so good to us. I can't say anything other than that. He blesses us with more and more as we spend each day with our Ashley. She is a joy!

Every morning I clean up the play room from the day before as Ashley spends time cuddling dinosaur in her bed. She laughs and giggles and hums to him while I prepare the room for her to get into later on. I pick up a thousand puzzle pieces. Replace every single book on the shelf. Arrange her DVD's back in the case. Return bins of bugs, blocks, cars, animals to the shelves. I vacuum the rug, straighten the chairs, and fluff the pillows in the window seat. All in preparation of a day spent playing with this tiny girl I call mine.

This morning as I cleaned up I found myself smiling and praising God for another day of messes. Sounds silly, I know, but there is something about picking up after Ashley Kate, or washing laundry that belongs to Ash, or even preparing bags of TPN and meds that brings smiles to my face. I would do these things a thousand times a day, and some days it feels as though I do, just because it means our girl is home. There is joy in that feeling.

In addition to playing with Ash I have been spending most of my days each week watching the big kids play one sport or another. I love being there. Love traveling from town to town behind that big yellow bus. Love being the mom of Blake and Al. They amaze me with their talents. They make me smile as they run up and down the court, hit the ball over the net, round the bases, kick the ball into the goal, etc. etc. If its a sport and it can be played then one of my two older kiddos is out there playing it. Currently both kids are on the starting line ups for basketball. Allie is playing club volleyball on the elite team. We are traveling to her first tournament this weekend:) in Dallas. Soccer registration has been mailed and we are awaiting her practice schedule. High school baseball try outs are just around the corner. Literally only weeks away. Blake works out with the coach and his best friend at the end of each school day before attending basketball practice. We are busy playing and enjoying our time together while we are blessed to have it.

Its nice to play with my kids. Such a gift to have these children in our home. We love battling it out in anything from ping pong in the game room to a nice game of one on one out back in the drive way or even a round of dominoes at the table. I love being a mom. Absolutely love it. Love these kids of mine.

Today is a good day. A concert is being played on a lady bug drum from the other room. Mix that sound with the roar of the ugly, orange dinosaur and its music to my ears as I work on the laundry. God is good. He still is.


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