Holding On
The ugly word of the day is Group D Enterococcus. This was found on a central line draw and seems to be the cause of Ashley's current struggle.
Today we have seen Ashley's blood gases show a very slight improvement, but at this point we will take it. Most of the morning we watched helplessly as her heart rate continued to climb, her blood pressure dropped way to low and her temperature was down to 95. Her arms and legs were cold as her body was trying to maintain her core body temperature. They are trying to get the fluid in her body to shift back into her cells and out of the tissues. They have done an ultrasound of her abdomen looking for pockets of fluid, but we have not heard the results yet. All in all Ashley is still listed in critical condition and things have not yet improved, but she is holding on.
The room we are in seems so very cold and non welcoming compared to the way things were in our previous room in the PICU. I have been afraid to bring Ash's things back down here because I don't want to upset anyone. I feel like if we have to live here again I should not try to cause trouble with those who do not want us to feel at home. I did bring in her CD player and her Christmas music, but those are the only signs of the holiday you can see. My heart hurts even more when I think about spending Christmas here in this horrible room so I am trying to ignore the fact that this is where we will be without a tree, lights, gifts, family and everything else we love so very much. The important things will not change. We will still celebrate the birth of Jesus in our hearts as we wait and watch for Ash to become stronger. He will still be with us, even in this place. I am not sure how I will do it, but my goal is to try and provide Blake and Allie with a traditional Christmas. One of the nurses who has become a friend of mine has offered to let us use her Christmas tree. So we will decorate the night they arrive and try to do something each day in anticipation of the holiday. We will have the apartment so Dave and I may take turns spending time with them there. It is still 3 weeks away, so maybe God has big things in store for us.
Dave has decided not to return home today. He would like to see her stabilize a little more before he returns. He will have to deal with any problems caused by this decision once he does go back. At this point Ash is the priority. I am praying for Blake and Allie to be strong while we are both away from them. They have no idea how things are at this point, so please be discreet with what you say when you see them. Their little hearts are so heavy already and we don't wish to place them under any additional stress. Thank you for coming by to check on our Ashley today. We will post with any changes throughout the day. Please know that you are appreciated. May He bless you and your families today.
Today we have seen Ashley's blood gases show a very slight improvement, but at this point we will take it. Most of the morning we watched helplessly as her heart rate continued to climb, her blood pressure dropped way to low and her temperature was down to 95. Her arms and legs were cold as her body was trying to maintain her core body temperature. They are trying to get the fluid in her body to shift back into her cells and out of the tissues. They have done an ultrasound of her abdomen looking for pockets of fluid, but we have not heard the results yet. All in all Ashley is still listed in critical condition and things have not yet improved, but she is holding on.
The room we are in seems so very cold and non welcoming compared to the way things were in our previous room in the PICU. I have been afraid to bring Ash's things back down here because I don't want to upset anyone. I feel like if we have to live here again I should not try to cause trouble with those who do not want us to feel at home. I did bring in her CD player and her Christmas music, but those are the only signs of the holiday you can see. My heart hurts even more when I think about spending Christmas here in this horrible room so I am trying to ignore the fact that this is where we will be without a tree, lights, gifts, family and everything else we love so very much. The important things will not change. We will still celebrate the birth of Jesus in our hearts as we wait and watch for Ash to become stronger. He will still be with us, even in this place. I am not sure how I will do it, but my goal is to try and provide Blake and Allie with a traditional Christmas. One of the nurses who has become a friend of mine has offered to let us use her Christmas tree. So we will decorate the night they arrive and try to do something each day in anticipation of the holiday. We will have the apartment so Dave and I may take turns spending time with them there. It is still 3 weeks away, so maybe God has big things in store for us.
Dave has decided not to return home today. He would like to see her stabilize a little more before he returns. He will have to deal with any problems caused by this decision once he does go back. At this point Ash is the priority. I am praying for Blake and Allie to be strong while we are both away from them. They have no idea how things are at this point, so please be discreet with what you say when you see them. Their little hearts are so heavy already and we don't wish to place them under any additional stress. Thank you for coming by to check on our Ashley today. We will post with any changes throughout the day. Please know that you are appreciated. May He bless you and your families today.
posted by Ashley @ 1:14 PM
4 Comments:
Well, at least they know what they are dealing with & might more aggressively be able to help Ash with that knowledge in hand. Wish I had a magic wand to make all this go away & Ash better.....but that isn't possible....it is only our creator who has the power to change this situation. I know you must grow weary posting ....day after day....enduring so much.....Praying for God to lift you up today....to shine rays of hope down on you guys....through progress with labs....improvements.....something to encourage your hearts today. I will check on you later.....hang in there... praying.... (=
I just wanted to let you know that I am praying so hard for your family and for dear Ashley. Although my heart breaks to see what you all are going through, it overflows with joy at the assurance that you are held in the everlasting arms. Praying...
I'm continuing to pray that tomorrow will bring improvement in Ashley and a glimmer of hope for you both!
Y'all hang in there, and know that when you get tired, people all around the world are lifting up you and your sweet girl!
Please bring your tree, please make this your home. I can't even imagine how hard this is right now for your family. But we want you to feel at home. We want you to feel comfortable with us. We all pray for your family and even though we are silent sometimes we just don't know what to say as your struggle has been long and hard but we all care about all of you. Sometimes us PICU nurses say the wrong things, do the wrong things but we mean well and we want you to have a somewhat of a normal life as you can have in this unit. I know you can't have the lights but please bless us with your spirit because it is good for us too. We get down and blue too when we have to take care of kids that are so sick and families that are so nice that they don't deserve to go through all of this. So please remember our silence is not always bad sometimes we are at a loss for words. Remember we pray and support you even though it may not always seem like it. We want the best for Ashley and your family. Please forgive us for any misconceptions we have given you. I have heard so many of us praying and thinking of you. God Bless....
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home