The Snow is falling...

I woke to a beautiful wintery scene outside our window here in the PICU. The snow is beautiful and it makes me miss my kids ( my Blake, my Allison, and of course the big one, Dave). They would love it. I just spoke with Allison and told her how much I loved her, I was praying for her today, and I am so very proud of her. I asked her to do her very best and to have a GREAT time. She is now on the warm up floor preparing to go on. Oh, how I would love to be there with her this weekend. Dave assured me he is busy being a "shutter bug" , and I hope to see the results of todays competition by tonight. I think he learned a valuable lesson after forgetting to take pictures of Blake's birthday in the fall. He doesn't want to listen to me cry.

Ash had a long night. She was nauseated and vomitting several times throughout it. This morning we have decreased her feeds and unfortunately we have to go up on her TPN. We are also going to start weaning the hydrocortisone steroid that has caused Ashley to lose her "face". Dave and I are very upset at her appearance because of this steroid. They are treating her with it based on an assumption and with no proof that she really needs. It has completely shut down her adrenal system and now it will take weeks and weeks to get her off of it, but I want it gone. This morning she couldn't even open her eyes because it has caused so much swelling in her face. It is so difficult for me to see her this way. She has lost all of her tiny features that God gave to her. I think it will take about 5 weeks before she cant come off of it completely. I can't even bring myself to take pictures of her looking this way. The good thing is that she is still so very happy. She has been playing with the baby in the mirror all morning and she is now down for a little nap.

Today starts the beginning of a long and slow weekend. Sometimes I welcome the quietness in the halls over the weekends and other times it seems to make it drag on and on and on. I am trying not to think about the upcoming surgery and procedures that lay in store for Ashley. I am going to concentrate on playing and loving her as much as I possibly can. Thank you for your prayers this morning and for coming to visit. You are loved and appreciated.