Tonight's Dinner

Blake and I decided to cook dinner for the girls tonight. It was really his idea so don't give me the credit. I found a couple of cans in the pantry that Nan had recently bought at the grocery store. Stir fry. In a can? OK my better judgement says no, but most of the time I am inherently lazy when it comes to cooking so I will give this a try. Now Blake is a bit smarter than me when it comes to these things so he decided to put a frozen pizza in the oven for him and Allie. Smart boy. I put on the CD of travel music I made after our vacation last year. It is songs they played while we were away that I like to listen to while I dream about going to the Caribbean. I opened the meat can, yeah I know meat is not supposed to be in a can, and poured it into the pan. Dog food? I promise you this stuff smelled and looked just like dog food. We are not off to a good start. The stuff in the attached can must be better than this. I started heating the ??meat?? and Blake and I began grooving to the Vacation music. Well the dang smell was really starting to get to me from the ??meat?? so I decided to drain the juice off the junk. In the pantry I found a bottle of Kikkoman stir fry sauce. I cautiously tasted it and found that it was quite good. Maybe if I drain enough of the dog food gravy off the ??meat?? and pour in some of this stuff it will be OK. So as I am doing this Blake starts to show me his break dancing moves. WHOA, flashback.....I am remembering when I was his age all decked out in my parachute pants with 48 zippers doing the backspin on the cardboard in the living room while watching the Electric Boogaloo. Scary!! Well he showed me his stuff and then I ask him to step back while I showed him mine. Uh Huh.... Look out! I do that spinny thing I used to do when I was 14 then broke into my best backspin on the kitchen floor. I didn't break anything, in fact I think I was spinning more than when I was 14. I may have to take this up again. I know Trish will be so proud. Well now I have the, veggies from a can, heating up with the ??meat??, I have to do something, I got an idea maybe I can find some real meat and add it in. I opened the freezer and found a piece of chicken. Dad gum it, chicken takes to long to thaw, if only I had some shrimp. Hey look here I found a few shrimp. I began to thaw those little critters out and realized how bad they smell. I know Trish would not approve. I am glad these things taste better than they smell. I got the little guys thawed and threw them in with the ??meat?? and the questionable veggies and by this time Blake's frozen pizza is starting to smell pretty good and I don't even eat pizza. Things are cookin' now and we are both doing the Tootsie Roll across the floor. Slide to left, Slide to right, to the front, to the front, to the back, to the back now dip baby dip, dip baby dip, OK, we looked pretty ridiculous but we are making memories and it was reminding me of the time we did this with Goofy and Mickey. That was so much fun. Long story short, the food did end up tasting pretty bad. I have other words and descriptions of the flavor, but since this is a family blog I will bite my tongue and just say it tasted bad, really really bad. I would recommend you never try the La Choy stir fry in a blue can. YUCK!! I am glad I had a really good lunch with the Longview Too AMBUCS at Pappacita's Mexican restaurant. Look at the bright side, I had a really great time dancing like an idiot with my son in the kitchen.

Goodnight,


DAVE

I posted this and looked at the picture and it looks pretty good. But do not be deceived.

STAY AWAY FROM THE LA CHOY!!! They should call it La Poo Poo

PS: I just cleaned the kitchen and put the left overs down the garbage disposal. Have you ever seen a garbage disposal vomit?