Ashley's Story

She will leave fingerprints all over your heart

10/22/2007

The Weight of the World


I honestly don't know how he does it. This man must feel as though the weight of the world is on top of him, but yet he never lets me know if he is struggling. I crumble and fall apart all over him several times a day, and he never fails to encourage me and bring me back together. He can make me smile even on the toughest of days. He brings laughter into our home, our family, our relationship and thats what makes our life so great. Without his strength and his solid perspective I could not do this another day. I love him. I admire him. I respect him. I am thankful I get to know him, and even more thankful I am allowed to love him.

Once again he has put the pieces of my fragile heart back together and has encouraged me to keep on. His strength, and peace, and comfort comes from God. With all that he is managing in my absence you would think I would be the one to lift his spirits, but it is the other way around. All I do is Ashley Kate. He does everything else. Our home, our practice, our family, our life continues to run like clockwork because he is amazing and he works from early in the morning until late at night making sure things go right. After working a full day at the office, giving a lecture, settling the children and tucking them into bed, he is up packing for the trip. Tomorrow morning he will attend Allison's field trip with her and her fourth grade class, work a full afternoon at the office, and then jump in the car for a 14 hour drive. He will do it all with a happy heart and a willing spirit. Why? Because he loves us. He loves me. He loves our family. He loves our baby gherkin(and can't wait to hold her!). He loves God.

Thanks Dave for having the energy to encourage me tonight and for having so much excitement in your voice about coming to visit. I love you for keeping me centered and for allowing me to fall apart all over you. I can't wait for Wednesday morning!

Ash is still on her feedings. She doesn't feel well today and I am trying to imagine what it would feel like to use your tummy and your bowel for the first time in 35 days. I think I might feel a little yucky too. She has spiked a low temperature tonight and her heart rate is a little higher than I would like. She has been nauseated and thrown up several time today, but I think that is to be expected. Overall she is holding her own. When I pick her up she snuggles in under my chin and pats my arm with her tiny fingers reassuring me that its going to be alright. She has not slept much today and even though she looks exhausted I don't think she is going down tonight either. Her chest tube continues to put out way too much fluid. She is losing about 100cc every 6 hours. She has to get down to 30cc in 24 hours before they will pull it. Her side is sore and bruised and she screams any time you touch it. I have learned to pick her up in very interesting ways this week in an attempt to make her more comfortable.

Thank you for your prayers today. Things remain a little strained and tense. I honestly believe everyone is working toward what they believe to be in Ashley's best interest. We just have different ideas and different ways of getting there. Your prayers are so appreciated. Our ultimate goal is to take Ashley home and to give her the best quality of life we can. This is what our hearts desire. Getting to that place is not always easy. Anyway, thanks again for loving us and for loving Ash. Goodnight guys. Trish

19 Comments:

At 10:32 PM , Blogger Candy said...

Praying for you tonight. You know as a Mom what Ash needs, and you know that prayers Do work. Praying that Dave has a safe trip. Sleep well and God bless.

 
At 10:33 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

What a beautiful post! I loved the picture of your soulmate and the wonderful words you used to describe him. I still think of how wonderful God is when he joins two together as one and they complete one another. I have been blessed by that special man and know that God is the one that united us together. I will be praying for you and Ashley tonight, for Dave and he gets all of his jobs complete and heads to Omaha. I pray for traveling mercies for your family as they travel to be with you and Ashley. I ask that God give you and Ashley some much needed rest tonight and that He will take away the nausea and restore her little body.

 
At 10:38 PM , Anonymous lori said...

I hope you all have a restful night. I'm sorry Ashley isn't feeling well. I know her chest must be very sore. I hope they are able to remove the tube soon. Praying!!

I know you are so excited about your precious family coming to visit. Praying for safe travels for your family.

In Him,
Lori

 
At 10:46 PM , Anonymous Dee Dee in NC said...

Praying for you. So many ups and downs, it must be very hard on you.
You have a wonderful husband, but he has a wonderful wife.

 
At 11:02 PM , Anonymous Janiece Baldwin said...

Trish, not only is God using you and little Ashley as a testimony of His loving mercy and perserverence, but I think David is a testimony of His grace. It may not sound very manly, but it takes a very special guy to demonstrate God's beautiful grace and I am confident that David was handpicked to be that man. Praying for God's protection on him, Blake and Allie as they make the long drive to be with you for much deserved family time together.

I pray thatyou are able to get some quality rest tonight and as you awake in the morning you will feel such a sense of ease and peace and that whatever the source of the tension you were experiencing will be removed.
Praying always~~~Janiece

 
At 11:02 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Praying for rest and I am so excited for you all to be together as a family. I can only imagine the sparkle that will be in Ashley's eyes when she sees her daddy and brother and sister! As well as yours! This was a wonderful post and I know that Dave feels he is so lucky to have you! Thanks again for blessing my life everyday with the words of wisdom, faith and love. Mistie

 
At 11:13 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Roses and raindrops and chickens with whiskers....

 
At 11:19 PM , Anonymous April in Colorado said...

You are a blessed woman to have a man of strength, faith, and courage! I believe, though, that part of that is because God knew you would need such things!!

My eyes filled with tears when reading this post. I wondered before how you do this and I am certain that Dave is a HUGE part of how you do this.

My prayers continue for Ashley and you...my heart reaches to heaven, standing in the gap. I am sure that among all of us, your little baby is being prayed for just about 'round the clock!

Hugs and prayers...

 
At 11:22 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

What a tribute to a wonderful man! I think the same about my husband and wonder if any other wife does. You do! He is a gem! The Lord has given Dave to you and you to him. I pray for safety for their trip to Omaha and that you can get some much-needed rest tonight.

My prayers continuee, sweetie.

Shari

 
At 12:43 AM , Anonymous Kathleen said...

I loved the way you described Dave. You have a way with words! Will keep Ashley's specific needs in prayer and yours. Will also pray for Dave and the kids as they travel. Praying you all get the rest you need.

 
At 5:46 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Praying for a good day today.
Beth

 
At 7:39 AM , Blogger Sun said...

Awesome post! You are a wonderful wife and mother and David is an amazing dad and husband...you two are a great team! We are praying today - Sunshine

 
At 8:53 AM , Blogger Laurie said...

My husband of 39 years is this same kind of man and I know how much you appreciate him. They are so dependable and can be counted on. I can't wait for you to see him and Blake and Allie on Wednesday morning!
I am praying for them to have a safe trip driving out there to you. My prayers continue for Ashleys lung to stop putting out fluid, wherever it is coming from and for her little body to continue healing. Hang on Trish, your heart is going to fill to overflowing tomorrow morning when you are all together. I am excited for you and Ashley. Hope you post pictures of her face when she sees them:) Praying for the tensions to cease in the hours ahead. You are loved.

Laurie in Ca.

 
At 9:05 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am happy to hear that she is still on feeds. Your post was very beautiful lucky is the woman who has a Godly man. Praying for Ash, You and Dave and the kids as they travel. (((hugs))) ~Chan~

 
At 9:33 AM , Blogger CrownLaidDown said...

Praying that weight to be lifted and placed on Christ's shoulders, so that you both may walk with a lighter step today. Praying for Ashley.
Love,
holly

 
At 10:03 AM , Blogger Amy T said...

What a wonderful post! You are so blessed to have each other. Praying for a safe trip for them and a restful day and night for you and Ashley so you can be all rested when they get there! I'm so excited for you and them! I bet the kids are bouncing off the walls with excitement!

 
At 12:30 PM , Anonymous dee buchanan said...

You have a wonderful way of edifying everyone in your home. Thank you for your godly example. Praying for you and whatever you may face today, and of course, for Ashley that her bowel is strong and handles the feeds well.

 
At 6:17 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Let go and let God ...

VG

 
At 6:25 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Let go and let God...the ultimate physician.

 

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