Ashley's Story

She will leave fingerprints all over your heart

1/22/2008

Her bag of tricks

She's good! Her tactics are tough to go up against. She has a bag of tricks and she isn't afraid to use them. Let's discuss just what Ashley Kate has been up to this week to manipulate and avoid therapy.

1. She is just so darn cute! (well, not exactly a new tactic but one she uses well)

2. She is still little. (who wants to make a baby work hard?)

3. She cries. I mean cries hard. Big, fat, crocodile type tears. It is so, so sad.

4. She pulls her hair and pokes her eyes breaking the hearts of those who are trained and determined to teach her how to move.

5. She's happy. That is until you bring in a therapist. The minute they walk in the door she becomes very, very sad. I tell you it's heartbreaking and tough to be a part of.

6. She is stubborn. Even more so than her big sister and any of you who knew what my beautiful Allie was like as a toddler knows that this one was hard to beat. Ashley takes the cake. There is no making her do anything she doesn't want to do.

7. She gets sleepy. Instantly. I mean how I can't manage to get her to take a nap but the second her therapists sit down she can't keep her eyes open is baffling to me.

8. And her newest trick...she throws up. She makes herself throw up. I am not kidding! Tonight she pulled it with her daddy as he worked with her on the mats. What can you do? You can't work with her while she is covered in vomit. You have to stop and clean up the baby and then while you are doing it she FALLS ASLEEP! I am telling you this child is good!

So...whats a mom to do with a toddler like this? Quiting is not an option. Giving in to her nonsense will serve no purpose. Somehow, someway, we will convince her to cooperate. I just don't think its going to be easy or happen anytime soon. Every day we continue working. Its fun as long as she doesn't catch on, but the minute she does its all down hill from there. Because I love her so much I will keep waking up each day and encouraging her to learn to move. I believe in her. She'll get there. She's come too far not to. Whatever He has planned for her life will be accomplished in His time. Because I know that His timing is perfect I will learn to wait on Him. Its easy to say, but not so easy to do. We continue to grow as the pages of her story are written and some days are easier than others. We still have days when I cry because I struggle with all that she doesn't yet do, but then we have those days when all of that pales in comparison to who she is and what He is doing with her life. That stubborn streak she has is what has kept her going through some really tough times. I have to be honest and admit that I am thankful she is as stubborn as she is.

10 Comments:

At 11:53 PM , Blogger Morgy's Mama said...

It really is a tough transition... starting therapy over again. One thing that came to mind is that Morgan vomits when she cries a lot. It is always helpful to me to make sure her tummy is fairly empty just before we do something I know will be stressful that may bring on the tears. I don't know if that's an option with Ashley, but I thought I'd throw it out there.

 
At 12:15 AM , Blogger Dee Dee said...

A good friend's little girl would throw up when she was put to bed, when she was still in the crib. Wanted Mom to come back, and it worked. She had a great gag reflex.
One day, while still very small, she started to gag when Dad was near her, and he sternly told her, "Don't you dare," and she didn't ! As far as I know that was the end, or at least the beginning of the end, of the problem.

 
At 8:27 AM , Blogger Laurie said...

I love this post and the honesty here. Isn't it amazing that someone so young and small, possesses the qualities to manipulate those around her? Stubborn is a good trait, it just needs molding and shaping to work for her instead of using it against others. This is like breaking a bad habit, one that I know she will give into when she gets tired of fighting it and discovers it brings her more freedom and control and praise.
I am praying for all of you as she settles into her new routine, at her own pace. She is getting healthier and she is home. Just keep loving her and doing what you are doing. She will get the message.

Love, Laurie in Ca.

 
At 9:00 AM , Blogger Keri Ann said...

What a clever little pickle you have! I'm afraid I have no helpful suggestions. But I would predict that eventually, if you and the therapists are persistent, she will one day just give up. I'm sure you remember similiar situations with your older kids, when you just had to be a LITTLE more stubborn than they were, and suddenly they'd decide it (whatever "it" was) wasn't worth the trouble any more. I'm sure it's still just awful to deal with in the meantime, though; so please don't think I'm trying to minimize things!

I suppose that much like in daily life, persistence and prayer are what will pay the richest dividends in the end!

 
At 10:54 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

She is good. I can't imagine some of her tricks. We are praying for you guys.
I did babysit a baby that would hold her breath until she passed out, when she didn't get her way. Her mom had a very hard time ignoring that one, although her doc. said to ignore it and when she passed out she would start breathing again.
I hope Ash doesn't think of that one.You guys are doing great, hang in there.
Emily

 
At 11:52 AM , Blogger Amy T said...

I'm praying that she soon turns that stubborness to completing the task instead of fighting it. She's one smart cookie and I think given time, that stubborness is going to be a great aid (as it has so far). I know the laughter and tears are mixed on this one.

 
At 12:19 PM , Anonymous Tiffany said...

Okay, your little pickle is very sneaky. She knows you guys and she knows how to work her cuteness! What a smart little girl. Reading of her bag of tricks made me giggle a little bit.

Hang in there, although it is tough. Just reading about this I can just imagine how hard it can be. But we are praying for you guys!

 
At 2:26 PM , Blogger Gretchen said...

It sounds to me that she's also S.M.A.R.T! ;)

Hang in there o-weary-mom.

(((hugs)))

 
At 8:35 PM , Blogger Sun said...

you have a heart of gold! Sunshine

 
At 10:06 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well with all of her problems at least you won't have to worry if she is smart or not. That cute little girl amazes me. I am so glad that she has that stubborn quality.
Michelle

 

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