She knows

I'm convinced that she does. She always knows. She is so restless tonight. Absolutely not herself. Last night she and I didn't close our eyes until after 3:30. I'm so tired and really nervous. She's so tired and more restless than I have seen in a very, very long time.

Her surgery is second on the schedule tomorrow morning. That means we check in at 6:30a.m. We will be leaving our house about 5 a.m. I need to stay up for one more hour so I can stop her feeds at midnight and then I'm going to try and get some sleep.

The procedure is small. Should be quick and no big deal. The only issue is the bleeding. Her clotting factors are still out of whack because of her coumidin. She's been on it for 5 months and because of this they want to remove the line in the OR rather than the office. My main concern is the ventilator. Her history with intubation is long and ugly. Once I see her in recovery and know that she is no longer on the vent then all will be well.

I just want her to ok.

Back to the whole candy land theme and Ashley's diet. Its really not a big deal. Ash doesn't know what birthdays are. She just doesn't have the ability to understand. She doesn't know what candy is. She's never had it. Yes, I am aware that some bowel transplant kids eat candy and chips and the like. Everybody is different. My job is to take care of Ashley Kate. Thats what I do. I choose to follow the recommendations of her nutritionists. Each family is a little different and thats ok. I don't want Ash to suffer from any unnecessary issues due to my decision to take chances. I'm just not willing to do that. Thats what Dave and I have decided for our family. Doesn't mean its right or wrong. Just what we want to do.

Anyway, were excited about her party, nervous about tomorrow, and appreciative of all your prayers. Goodnight my friends. Trish