Baby Steps...

When I arrived last night I was so excited to see Ash. I went into her room and was surprised at who was there. She is very swollen especially in her face and around her eyes. I recognized her as the Gherkin, but she really doesn't look much like she did on my last visit. I picked up her hand and there was nothing there. No squeeze, no wave, no muscle tone at all. Her body is 100% limp. She is in this drug induced paralytic state and it is so difficult to see her like this. I don't feel like I am seeing her as much as just her "shell." God has created the most amazing thing in the human body, but as amazing as it is, without the spirit or soul it is just a collection of molecules. It was so hard to see her with my vision but have zero connection with her insides. I pray that before we leave Blake and I will get the opportunity to "see" our Gherkin. I am amazed at my wife and the strength she has to live this day in and day out. Things change so fast around here I don't blame her for never sleeping.

This morning seems to bring a glimmer of good news. Ash's respiratory status has improved slightly. The level of support from the respirator has been turned down a bit. There is talk that later today they will begin to remove the paralytic drugs and we may get to "see" our Gherkin later tonight or in the morning. I do pray that Blake will get this opportunity. I am praying that Ash will get to see him because if anyone can help her have a brighter day it is her brother. We can tell they have a special bond.

It's nothing....

There is nothing there.....

The cultures are negative....

We don't know??

These are the words of the infectious disease Dr. this morning. I love this. There is never anything found yet Ash gets very sick. I really appreciated this Dr. because she said that they don't have to know what it is as long as the babies get better. This is a great attitude to have. I tell my patients on a regular basis that when the get better don't give me the credit, give it to God. Sometimes we as people try to know everything and we are so intellectual that we have to fix everything. I recognize that all health and healing comes from our Creator not from all of our intellectual knowledge. I am glad to see that someone around here feels the same way. As you pray today please ask God to protect our little Gherkin. Thank you for your prayers. We gain so much from each one of you.

DAVE