Finally Connected!

It has been a struggle, but we are finally connected to our Ashley's journal here in the apartment. I am so happy to be back. I have really missed being able to communicate our daily happenings with all of our friends and family. What a blessing this little journal has turned out to be. God has really used it to minister to us during this time in our Ashley's life. I am more than thankful Dave was able to talk me into to doing it with him.

There are so many things I could write about, but I don't know where to start. I wish you all could have seen our little pickle when her daddy walked in this morning. I have never seen her so happy. She smiled. She laughed. She squealed. She giggled and then she would turn her little face into my chest and pretend to be shy. It was the cutest thing I have ever seen. We took some fabulous video of it, but for some reason it won't work here so Dave is going to post it when he gets back home. I really wanted to show everyone how happy Ash is here in our apartment.

We have been out of the hospital for 5 full days now. I can't believe it. I really expected to have to turn around and take her right back for some reason or another. Ash is adjusting really well to the apartment, and I think I have finally figured out how to handle all of my new responsibilities. I can't tell you how intimidating the first day on our own was. Just knowing that it was my responsibility to get everything done at the right time and then trying to figure out a system that would work for me to stay organized enough to accomplish it. I think I called Dave crying at least three days in a row. She really is doing great. I have prayed everyday for God to please protect her from infection and from rejection. I truly believe that if she had not gotten this cancer in her lungs that we would be on our way home. I know that He has a reason for everything that has happened in our Ashley's life and I am trying to just stay willing and patiently wait on Him to reveal our next step. At this point in our journey I am just so very grateful to have made it out of the hospital. My prayer is that she might stay well enough to not have to return until it is time to for her take down operation. Wouldn't that be wonderful!

Many times a day I find myself just sitting here in the apartment with a heart of thanksgiving. It is so comfortable here. It isn't home, but it is so much closer to home then our room in the PICU was. Just having the opportunity to cook a meal, to do laundry, to play with Ash on the floor, to snuggle her close on the couch, and to lay down my head on my pillow IN A BED is more than wonderful.

Yesterday I was able to visit with a precious friend whose daughter had a transplant also. They actually made it all the way home to South Carolina last month. It was such a blessing to talk to her. (One of the most valuable things I will take with me from this journey are the friendships that He has brought to me during this time.) As we talked by phone I shared with her that I am beginning to realize that this transplant journey has been a gift. Our daughter's diagnosis and illness' have actually been precious gifts. Please don't misunderstand me. If I could spare our sweet girls the pain and struggles then obviously I would, but God has used their circumstances to change who we are. I know longer worry about things that I once did. Finances? Why should I fret? God has shown me over and over again that He is control and that He will provide. Petty arguments or disagreements with Dave? Honestly, he is my closest friend and we are in this together. Why would I want to be on opposite sides with him? Little things the kids do or don't do? There are more important things in their lives for me to concentrate on. Like their character. I have learned so much about what is important and what is not. Everyday that my Ashley is allowed to live teaches me just how precious the gift of life is. I don't want to waste one moment, one day, one opportunity.

So many things have happened and I want to share them with you, but I am going to close for now because our little pickle is due for her meds and she is giving her daddy a really hard time. I think he could use a little help. Thank you all for your patience during our absence. Thank you for you kind words of support toward my amazing husband. Thank you for loving our daughter enough to keep coming back and to keep praying. I love you guys and I have missed you terribly. Take care and good night from our apartment. Trish