She looks incredible! She is incredible! Ashley Kate is absolutely thriving!
I would have never thought days like this would ever be a possibility for us again as I sat with her tiny, pain ridden body, that was so broken and so weak just a mere 8months back. I never dreamed our girl could continue to live a life so fully without her bowel. I am blown away at every single day we are given with her in it.
Ash is happy. So very happy. She is beautiful. She is so stable it scares us. Even with this fragile central line she continues to thrive. Even with an infection so frightening raging inside her head she continues to thrive. It doesn't make sense. None of her life really makes sense. Its one of those things you look at and say, "How? Why? What is making this work?" and then you answer, "God." Thats it. The only answer that can even begin to explain this child of ours.
We are busy living. So busy just living with our daughter. I have no time to devote to thoughts of tomorrow. No time to worry about the whens and wheres of transplant. No time to waste on the wondering of things I cannot change. I'm enjoying watching Ashley Kate be 5. I am enjoying her smile. Her laughter. Her hugs and kisses. Her antics. Her happiness.
Today Ash is thriving. Today is what we have. Today is where my focus lies. Today is enough.
Tomorrow things may be different. Tomorrow may not even come. Tomorrow I can't keep from happening what is supposed to happen. Tomorrow her life is capable of slipping away from us.
I'm allowing Ash to live for today and although we know her tomorrows are going to be rough, still we smile and give thanks for today.
Oh, how I love this little girl!