Awake and Fighting

My sweet Ashley Kate is awake and fighting every step of the way. She has not slept for more than an hour at a time since the anesthesia wore off yesterday afternoon. Her eyes are now open and she continues to shake her head "no, no" when they touch her. They are struggling to find some type of drug combination that would make her rest. She kicks her little bunnies at them, she waves her arms. She is moving her entire body. I am so sad to know that she is uncomfortable and in pain, but my heart is singing because I can see that she is there. She is a fighter. She is going to come back from this. I think if we could make progress on the vent settings and get them down to allow her to do more breathing on her own then she would be much more comfortable.

There are many, many unknowns as a result of the cardiac arrest. No one knows how long her heart stopped or if there was a loss of oxygen to her brain. Her stoma(the part of the intestine that comes out of her abdomen and into her ostomy bag) had turned a very pale pink after the episode. We do not know if she suffered a lack of oxygen to the new organs. Only time will tell us if there was damage done. All of these things are out of my control so I am trying not to concentrate on any of them. My heart tells me that she will be fine. She responds to my voice. She opens her eyes when I talk to her. She shakes her head no in response to my questions. The coming days and weeks will hold the answers to the unknown, but for today I am thankful that she has it in her to be strong, and stubborn.

My prayer for her today is that she might find some peace and rest from her discomfort. I pray that she will dream of happy wonderful things. I pray that she will soon breathe on her own. I pray that she will hear me say, "I love you". I pray that my sweet Ashley Kate will come back from this event and be stronger because of it.

Thank you for your prayers for her today. I don't know what tests or procedures she must endure today, but your prayers would be so appreciated for this tiny baby gherkin who is a survivor. Someday she will learn of all the wonderful people who carried her burden for her so that she might rest. You all are more valuable to us than you will ever know and our hearts are humbled by any moment you spend in prayer for our family. Thank you. Love, Trish