Ashley's Story

She will leave fingerprints all over your heart

9/19/2007

Parenting all 3

At times like this it becomes very important for me to remember that I still need to take the time to parent all three of the children. As Ash's mommy I want to be the one who stays with her each and every moment that she struggles. I feel so torn when I am needing to be with her, but also needing to be with Blake and Allie. We try so hard to keep life as normal as possible for the older children even during Ash's tougher times. This week I have tried to make Blake and Al feel as though things will be ok and we will be back home with Ashley Kate soon.

Tonight we went out to dinner with Blake and Al while grandma sat with Ash. After dinner we took them to the hospital to see Ash. She was sleeping when we arrived, but unfortunately it didn't last more than a moment. She began groaning and struggling. Immediately Blake was concerned and very nervous about being there. He stood by her crib trying to soothe her, but her tummy hurts too much to be soothed. She thrashes around the crib and kicks her feet trying to make the cramping stop. The kids were scared and so I brought them back home. Dave is staying with Ashley Kate and I am going to try and stay home tonight. I tucked the kids into bed and spent time listening to them tell me all about their day. They are ready for Ash to come home. The house is too clean without her pallet of toys scattered in the living room and it is way too quiet. I am hoping Ash has a peaceful night. I can't imagine going through a repeat of last night. She is so tired and she really needs to rest. I'm only a few blocks away from the hospital so if I can't sleep and if I start to worry then I will run down to switch places with Dave. My biggest concern is him staying awake to help her when she throws up. I usually stay awake and just listen to her breathe while she is sick, and I am not sure he will be able to stay awake after working all day. I keep hearing her cry, but I know she's not here. I imagine she is tucked in next to her dad already.

Ash has had a really tough time with the vomiting today and she has maintained a fever for most of the day. That has been the most concerning. The good parts of today is that her ostomy output has slowed. I am encouraged by that. High output is a sign of rejection so knowing that it is going in the right direction gives me peace. She also continued peeing. That is very encouraging. She only had one dose of Lasix, but was able to maintain kidney function. Her new IV site is very sore and bothersome to her, but it has held all day. She is trying to pull it out of her arm so I kept a blanket wrapped around it for most of today. I'm praying it lasts until we bring her home so she doesn't have to through it again.

I really am tired so the idea of sleeping sounds so good to me. I hope that I can. More importantly I hope my sweet Ashley can. If I make it through the night then I will take Blake and Al to school in the morning and then relieve Dave at the hospital. That is the plan as long as all goes well. Your support continues to touch my heart. Thank you for praying. She's a pretty tough pickle. Good night. Trish

14 Comments:

At 9:31 PM , Blogger Sunshine said...

Bless your all's hearts - each and everyone - I pray that God lifts them up as you come before Him in prayer tonight. Sunshine

 
At 9:42 PM , Blogger Tamara said...

There are times when I struggle to give enough attention to my four children and we don't have any health issues. I am praying you will feel how your parenting has been a huge benefit and blessing to your children. God gave Blake, Ashley & Allie the best parents He could have, He hand picked you!!!! You are doing a great job! Still praying for Ashley Kate!!!

 
At 10:02 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

In the midst of this storm I am glad to hear that you are at home, knowing your heart is still at the hospital with Ashley, but you need to try to get some restful sleep so that you will have a clearer prospective and clarity of mind for decisions still to come for Ashley. You just cannot allow your body to "run" when it has no "fuel" left. So my prayer right now is that you can get some much needed peaceful sleep. Also praying that at this moment that David and precious little Ashley are curled up together and resting comfortably, at least for part of the night.
Father, just touch this family and give them strength and endurance, give them peace and mercy, and most of all I pray Your will be done and that You will be glorified in the witness of this family as they have placed their faith in You and their tesitmony proves their commitment to You.
Guide the doctors and the entire medical staff for right decisions for Ashley's care. This is my prayer in Jesus' precious name
~~~Amen.
Much love to all of you~~~Janiece

 
At 10:07 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

I've been thinking of you all day- so glad to hear that things are not any worse (and maybe just a wee bit better). Here's hoping and praying that Ashley sleeps well tonight and turns the corner tomorrow. Hope that you, too, can sleep- I can imagine how hard it is to relax when you're away from your beautiful little girl.
Hang in there-Megan

 
At 11:00 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Praying you all get some good rest tonight and that Ashley is feeling much better in the morning. ~Chan~

 
At 11:51 PM , Blogger Sarah said...

I'm just getting caught up on the last couple of days--I am so sorry to hear that Ashley is sick! I'm praying specifically for Ashley's fever and nausea, for your rest, and for Blake and Allie's peace. And for Dave, trying to balance work and being with you and Ashley. I'm praying this is just a quick detour in an otherwise smooth recovery for Ashley!! She is such an amazing little girl.

 
At 2:47 AM , Blogger Sarah Rahija said...

I haven't posted for a while, but still read weekly. My mommy's heart was breaking as I read your words ... we had a stomach virus at our house last week and it is so hard to comfort that, especially after several hours and days. I cannot imagine your turmoil, but know I will go to the Father with you about it.

Walking with you, lifting you to Him, and rejoicing with you in His goodness.

Sarah

 
At 6:21 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am in agreement with Janiece in her prayer, and continue to hope that Ashley improves steadily and soon.

 
At 8:30 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Trish - I have only posted a few comments to you in the past, but check in daily on Ashley and the rest of your family. Praying for peace and rest and healing and comfort for you all. I've asked the readers of my blog to pray for Ashley too!

 
At 8:34 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Praying for Ashley, and all of your family, this morning. May God richly bless you this day!

 
At 8:53 AM , Blogger Amy T said...

Still praying. Hope you got some much needed rest last night. I pray things are going well for y'all at the hospital this morning.

 
At 10:15 AM , Blogger Mayhem And Miracles said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

 
At 10:56 AM , Blogger Kelly said...

I am praying for your peace and comfort and for Ashley's total healing.

 
At 2:07 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ashley was on my mind all night last night. I am working the night shift right now, 6:00p.m. - 6:00a.m., and found my self thinking of her quite frequently. I even prayed for her in the prayer journal I keep in my purse while I am at work. If I am this concerned for her I can only imagine how you and Dave and the kids must feel.
Dear Lord Jesus I pray for this family right now. I pray that you would set Blake and Allie's mind at ease. I know they are concerned for their sister and it is hard for them to see her in pain. Give Dave the stregth and wisdom and discernment to know how to lead his family at this time. Give Trish PEACE at this time, Lord. I can tell that she is worried. Help her to remember that the very same God who has brought Ashley this far through her cancer is the very same God who is with her now in this.
My husband prayed for your sweet Ashley this morning. He doesn't read Ashley's story but I tell him all about it so he knows Ashley and family vicariously through me. He said, "These are real people, Judy. She doesn't know why she's hurting. We need to pray for them."
And so he led us in prayer this morning.
I leave you with these closing words spoken by Joni Eareckson Tada: 'Never forget in the darkness what you learned in the light.'
God is still God. In cancer, and in this. Whatever it is that's got her. Blessings and peace to you.

 

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