Back to the Drawing board

All of today's trouble was just a warm up of what tomorrow may bring. I can't believe what I am going to share with you now. In just two short hours Ashley's chest tube was pulled out. How? We have no idea. They ordered an x- ray to see how much fluid remained and by 9:30 the film showed that the drain tube was no longer inserted into her lung. I can't describe to you how frustrated and defeated I felt at that moment.



The resident came down and told me he wanted to remove the dressing in order to get a good look at the site. I refused. No thank you. She has been through enough tonight. There was no way I was about to let him remove that dressing, pull out those stitches and the tube. Not tonight. She is in no danger from it remaining under the skin and I would like for her to be left alone.




So now my sweet Ashley lays sleeping under her oxygen tent. Sleeping until they come in for another set of vitals. She has until 2a.m. and then up she will be once again. Under the tent she is at 98% oxygen saturation. The highest she has been all day. Her heart rate is lingering in the 150's and after a day like this that is a relaxed rate.



After speaking with the doctor who is on tonight I learned that the fluid is already re accumulating in Ash's lung. Where is it coming from is what I would like to know. They have no idea. The thought of putting her through this procedure again in the morning makes my head spin. I am so discouraged. They may take her into the OR in order to get a better look and better position. I don't even know what to say. I am numb.


Ash continues to run a fever and vomit. She has a nasty cough that seems to bring on the episodes. She just doesn't feel good tonight. I guess if I were looking for the positives from today's situation I would find: 1. We were able to pull of 200ccs of fluid. 2. We were able to avoid the ventilator(so far. The doctor tonight says he won't be surprised if she in on by morning). 3. God has blessed me with friends who are willing to go out of their way for me on what proved to be a very long and trying day. All in all we are still blessed.

I am so tired. My feet and back are hurting from standing next to her bed for 11 or so hours today. I have finally taken a shower and am now ready to sit next to her crib and try to close my eyes. I pray tomorrow brings us good news and not the expected course. Have I told you lately how very much we miss home? Ash and I want to go there more than anything. Tonight makes 4 weeks since she has been in her own crib in the nursery and 4 weeks since I have laid next to Dave holding his hand underneath our pillows. How I wish we were surrounded by Blake and Allie and Dave tonight. When I close my eyes I see their faces and I dream of being home again. Perhaps tonight will be no different.