The Best Part of My Day
We made it home around 3:30 this morning with all three kids snoring in their seat belts. How unreal it was realizing we were all together traveling back toward our hometown. The night was a rough one for me as I snuck into the house (while all of the kids were still sleeping) to retrieve uniforms and backpacks for school. I don't know what I was expecting,but let me just share with you that I finally had my breakdown. I could not believe the state my home was in. I could not believe that my sweet family was trying to live in this place. I cried and cried and cried. I think it was the mess, the remodel, the piled high laundry, the dirty kitchen(due to no running water, the clutter, the dust, the in ability to safely walk through any room, but mostly the fatigue(emotional and physical) that caused me to run screaming from my home. I drove the kids to my in-laws, tucked them all in bed, cleaned up Ash's ostomy mess, and left them in the watchful eye of their grandmothers so that I could return to our house and try to make some sense out of it all. I worked from 4:30 until 6:00 trying to locate enough clean pieces of clothing to put together a uniform that would meet dress code for the kids. I moved, I cried, I shifted, I cried, I swept, I cried until it was time to return to my in-laws in order to wake the kids and get them ready for school. I drove them to school and then went to take care of my Ashley Kate. Throughout the day I tried to get a grip on my emotional state. I tried to reason with myself that all of this was not a big deal. I tried to concentrate on the miracle of my beautiful baby and that we were finally home. I tried. Even though I am counting my blessings that continue to fall all over me and surround me, the reality of my life is this: MY HOUSE, OUR HOME, is in shambles. We have to get some work done on it and get it done fast! My wonderful husband is working non stop at the office and then on the remodel and he is exhausted. I don't know that he will be able to keep up this pace. I have decided to spend a few hours everyday while my mom cares for Ash trying to fix this place and turn it back onto the precious home I left six months ago. Trust me when I tell you that I believe with my whole heart and my whole life that God knew what I was walking into, but the shock of it all combined with my exhaustion almost broke me in the early morning hours. Now that I have settled down, I have formed a plan in my mind between running Ash's meds, appointments, pumps, and playtime to get a grip on this house that she can't even enter at this point and to make it all good again.
Now to share with you all the best part of my day. Can you guess what it was? Let me tell you. It was the CARPOOL line out in front of MY children's school. There I was when it hit me. I had been waiting all day to GET to sit in that line and watch those two amazing kiddos come running to meet ME in our car. What a great feeling. Their eyes lit up when they saw me there. I asked them if they knew I was coming to get them or not and Blake said, "I knew you wouldn't miss out on this on your first day home. I just knew it!" Allie said, " I had no idea who was coming, because it is always somebody different, and I didn't even remember it could be you." We promptly caught up on all the days events and ran to Chick- fil- a for an after school snack. What a great life we are living.
I am now going to go put in a couple of hours work in this place that used to be our home, before we return to grandma's house for dinner and to play with our baby gherkin. By the way, did we forget to mention that God brought our little one home and now we are all together again? I really am living a blessed life. Talk to you all later tonight. Love, Trish