Ashley's Story

She will leave fingerprints all over your heart


Just being Normal

Let me share with you how wonderful it feels to just be normal again. I will take a boring old, nothing exciting, no shocking news kind of day over some of the more packed full ones that I have lived with my Ashley during the past six months. Today was just a getting back to normal day. We did normal things like, waking the kids up to shower, driving them to school, running forgotten belongings back up to the school, cleaning bedrooms, fielding phone calls coming from all sorts of directions, searching for contractors, plumbers, air conditioner men and the like, running to the office, picking up kids from school, managing home work, and then the finale; sitting down together for dinner around the table and catching up with everybody. How great it was to sit down and enjoy dinner with my family as opposed to my frozen burrito and bag of popcorn from the convenience store down stairs at the hospital. Before dinner our Allison took the time to create name cards for everyone's place at the dinner table. I think she did it mostly because she is very glad I am home and she wants to make sure no one else gets to sit next me. Each card had a personalized printing of the person's name and some sort of design on it. Blake's had a baseball, Allison's a flower, Ashley's a heart with a flower in it, etc. etc. When Graypa sat down and saw his name plate and the line that was drawn under his name Allie looked at him and said, "What? Its not like you are boring or anything. That's all I could come up with." That silly girl. She continues to crack me up with her silliness. Anyway, I just found myself enjoying the normalcy and the company that I am allowed to share with this group of people.

Before dinner I received a call from the transplant team. It is never a good feeling when you receive a message to call them. Especially when they take the time to call you after hours. So with fear and trembling I returned the call. They are concerned about Ashley's white blood cell count. There doesn't really seem to be one. She has hit what is called the "nadir" period and this means that for a few days she actually has very little defense against germs or disease. They wanted to make sure that we had already been in contact with an oncologist and that we were scheduled to see them before long. They reminded me to be very, very careful with her, to wear masks around her, and not to take her out anywhere. I assured them we would all place out masks on, that we were all showering and changing clothes as we entered the house before touching her, and that she was not going out anywhere. What a scary time this happens to be in our Ashley's story. She looks really great, but she is so fragile. We are actually scheduled for an oncology appointment this Thursday in Dallas and her chemo treatment is to follow that. I expect it to be a very long day, but I am praying we can beat the 16 hour day we spent getting treatment last week. I suppose they will have to decide if it is safe to run the chemo with her counts so low or not. On Monday morning we will be back in Dallas to receive her monthly Cytogam infusion. They made this appointment for me at 7:45a.m. I think that is insane! I am hoping to remind them that I live 2 and 1/2 hours away and that it makes for a really long day when I have to be up and driving by 3:30. Surely they will see how unreasonable this is. That infusion will be followed by an appointment with our GI doctors in Dallas. That should be kind of fun because they haven't seen Ash since we left in August and she only weighed 12lbs at that time. I am looking forward to that visit.

Well, all things are now quiet here at Grandmas house and I have been given the opportunity to sneak in and kiss those precious foreheads. I love just being normal. I am going to go and take my opportunity to stand and linger over each of my "babies" for as long as it feels good(I may be standing there until morning), but the blessing is that I am "home" and that I can. Thank you all for praying for us today. I pray that each of you are blessed as you sleep and that each of you were given the opportunity to kiss you own sweet "babies" good night. Take care. Trish


At 10:08 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm so happy you got to experience a sense of normalcy today. That really does bless my heart. I know how important it is for you to have family time with the kids and Dave.

I pray Ash stays infection free and continues to grow and get stronger. Also, I ask God to get you safely to Dallas on Thursday and all will go smoothly for you and Ash.

I'll see you ALL Thursday night. I love you and Sweet Dreams!


At 10:29 PM , Blogger Clemntine said...

Bless you. Bless your heart, and your family and your baby and your day and your doctors and your trips to Dallas. Bless you. In the all-powerful, healing, precious, perfect, conquering, holy name of Jesus Christ, bless you.

At 10:31 PM , Blogger Sarah's In the Midst of It said...

I love reading about you eating around the table together; when I first started reading you were already in Omaha, and it sounds weird--and wonderful!--for you to be at home!

I'll be praying for Ashley these few days of no white count, that she is kept safe from all germs. And also for an understanding staff at the hospital--just reading "3:30 a.m." makes me cringe, let alone actually having to be up then and driving!! Yuck.

And now since I've left you about 38 comments today, I'm calling it a night and am going to sleep :)

At 11:31 PM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am so happy you can start to get back to normal. That is just so great. I pray Ashley stays free from all illness during this time.

At 11:38 PM , Blogger Mayhem & Miracles said...

Our prayers for Ashley continue around this dinner table. Not a meal goes by she isn't mentioned.

At 11:39 PM , Blogger Mayhem & Miracles said...

I'll just assume by now you know it's me when I forget to change the name. -Nikki

At 12:23 AM , Blogger Overwhelmed! said...

Trish and Dave, I'm so glad you're having the opportunity to experience some normalcy again!

Sorry about the rude, hurtful comment you received in one of your previous posts. There's no call for that kind of behavior on this blog!

Your family remains in my thoughts and prayers!

At 12:38 AM , Anonymous Rae said...

I found you via In The Midst Of It and I just want to send you some hugs through blogworld! I'm so happy you have some time to just be normal. My prayers will be with you and your family, what you're going through is so difficult. I'm so sorry you received such a horrible comment before, it inspired me to write my WFMW post today. I hope you have a wonderful Wednesday. =)

At 3:27 AM , Blogger Dawn said...

Ahhhh, to be normal. What a wonderful blessing. Still praying for you ALL and still AMAZED at God's graces.

At 4:32 AM , Blogger Alison said...

Family dinner with all present! There is nothing like it!

At 6:49 AM , Blogger Susan said...

I do love family dinners! The endless chatter about each persons day and all that is running through their minds...sweet! Glad that you are experiencing some of the boring side of life. It is the best side really. Drama wears out really quickly. Have a blessed day! Love and hugs!

At 6:52 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey there baby sister~ wanted to let you know that when they grow up and move away, they never stop being your "babies". What a sweet surprise it was to have Jeffrey stop by last night just to talk to his mom for a few minuets, then I got to place those sweet kisses of long ago on his his forehead and cheeks during an extended embrace before he left. It truly blessed my heart and I never wanted to let go of him! So you keep on sneaking them nightly upon their heads, because one day they move out on their own and you never know when the next opportunity will be for those precious kisses to be laid upon their sweet heads. I love you~ Kathy

At 6:56 AM , Blogger Carey said...

Its good to hear your getting back the normalcy you all deserve. I hope you have great day.

At 6:57 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

What a blessing to hear that all the family was able to be together for dinner. Our GOD is so good and HIS blessings are never ending. We are so thankful that you are willing to share your life with us!
Much Love to all.

At 7:09 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

You bless me by your posts. I'm blessed reading of another Christian's journey...their ups and downs. And there are always ups when we call Him Savior.

I am so thankful for your family time. Praise His Name that your family is getting to spend this time together.

I pray that Ashley remain "germ" free. I pray that every medical personnel person that comes in contact w/Ashley be given discernment on the best decisions. I pray that this time continue.

I pray for continued strength and endurance for your family--specifically you and Dave. I pray that He continue to provide supernaturally for all your needs as you complete the work on your house.

Thank you for allowing us into your life. Thank you for sharing your walk. Thank you Jesus for Ashley!

Kristi in Texas

At 7:19 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Trish thank God for all. isnt He great! sorry I havent written much lately, but cindy has so I hope that all continues to go well for all of you, love always, Barron

At 8:32 AM , Blogger TCC said...

I've been away from my computer and heaven't checked in on Ashley's journal for at least a week...I am so excited for you to be home! Will continue to pray for your family as you adjust to this and enjoy it! Will also continue to pray for Ashley and her complete healing. He knows what He is doing!

At 9:05 AM , Anonymous Anonymous said...

Trish - I just love you. Even your journal pages of a walk outside in your hometown or a simple dinner altogether makes me cry, not to mention ones of falling apart when seeing your home in disarray or the fears and hurts you face. You touch my heart daily. I love that you can put your feelings into words and express them so beautifully. I am sure that many of us moms feel some similar things in our own lives, but it is so neat to see you express them and allow us to pray for you and your family. You are in my heart and prayers as I go throughout my day. Thanks for allowing us into your life. Lou Ann

At 9:37 AM , Blogger Karen said...

How wonderful "normal" is! I hope that it continues!! Love and blessings, Karen

At 9:40 AM , Blogger Connie said...

Trish! How I long for normal too. Every time I'm tempted to feel sorry for myself, I think of your life over the last several months, and my trials don't seem so huge. I miss home right now--I miss my car--the freedom to go wherever I want to, my cell phone, most of all my babies and my husband. And I've only been gone a month! I'm still praying for Ashley and your whole family. I am so glad when I think that you are HOME!

At 10:28 AM , Blogger Amanda said...

I'm happy and sad that considering chemo is in your normal day. My dad is 51 and just went thru chemo. I'm praying healing and wisdom and healing and healing for you and your family!

At 10:29 AM , Blogger Cheryl said...

May you all bask in the beauty of everyday things.

May your wounded hearts find healing.

It's never easy when our children see the ugly side of life - like seeing mom in tears - but in the end its gonna help grow her into the amazing young woman she is growing into.

Even in this God is aquainted with your grief. Please know how important Ashley's story is... because it is HIS story.

May you be blessed - may you find the endurance you need for this race.

Praying for you all.


At 12:01 PM , Blogger Shari F. said...

Trish-I am so happy that you got some normalcy today. I am sure it was a very sweet moment to have everyone at the dinner table. Alli-what a special little girl! To make all the name plates! Know I am praying for you today as you head to Dallas for Ash's appointment.

God Bless.

At 2:00 PM , Blogger Borbe Bunch said...

I am so happy for you, that God has blessed you with precious family time. I have just recently come to your blog and have been blessed by your heart of praise, even in the midst of some hard times.
I can clearly see your love for your children and your dependence upon God as He has you on a journey in raising your sweet family.
I will be in prayer for Ashley to stay healthy during this time and for safety on the road...I am familiar with early morning medical trips also :).
Also, ever since reading about your sweet Ashley and some hurtful things you have had to endure, know that I have, along with so many others :), been lifting you up before the throne of GRACE, asking the Lord to blanket you with comfort and peace.
Being overwhelmed is commom to mommys...and you Trish, are a WONDERFUL mommy, it is so OK to have a "moment", we ALL do!
I loved reading of how you are enjoying the things of your day, that many of us take for granted, such as waking your kids up! You were HOME to do that! :)
God has obviously taught you so very much through these last months...continue to be a learner, as you grow IN HIM.
OK, just wanted to say HI and let you know that another sister in Christ is praying for you!!!
God Bless,

At 2:12 PM , Anonymous Jeanned65 said...

i am sorry to hear that you got hurtful comments.
i want you to know even though you dont know me. I have been praying for ash and all of you.
god bless
trust in the lord.


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