The Storm

This morning I listened to a speech Blake gave at school this week and I was struck by how much I felt I could relate to what the disciples must have been feeling that day. His speech was taken from the passage of scripture in Mark 4:35-41.

I feel as though we are riding in a little, rickety, ship in the middle of the ocean and a huge storm has come about. The waves are washing over the sides of the ship and it is beginning to fill with water. The wind is blowing and I am afraid the ship may turn over. I begin trying to bail the water with my hands as fast and as furiously as I can. It doesn't seem to help. The more I try to save myself from the storm the deeper the water gets and the harder the winds blow. Many times I feel I am being tossed about and the fear and panic begins to well inside of my heart. All the while Jesus is there. At peace. He is waiting. He is resting. He knows I am struggling. He knows I am trying to save my Ashley. He knows that with the sound of His voice He can command the winds to cease and the waves to be still. He waits patiently for me to look to Him. After flailing about for far to long I desperately begin to call on Him. "Where are you?". "Don't you care that I am drowning?" " How can you rest while my daughter is slipping out of my grasp?" He rises and He answers me, "Peace, be still." and as I stand amazed that even the toughest of days and the roughest of seas obey His command I realize that all I need to do is call on His name. He says to me, "Trish, why are you so fearful? How is it that you have no faith?" I become humbled as I realize I have allowed my faith to become weak. I have allowed the waves and the winds to carry me off course. I have become overwhelmed by my circumstance and I have forgotten to believe that even this "storm" that I find my family in can and will be controlled by the command of His voice. Father, please forgive me when my faith becomes weak and I fear the storm as it rages in my life. Please bring peace to the struggles that lie ahead and bring a calm to my heart as I wait for You to bring this storm to an end.

After another sleepless night(that makes 3 in a row), Ash and I are resting today as we wait for tomorrow's procedure. The past experiences with this procedure make me fearful of the storm that could rage. I am looking for peace. The peace that comes through my faith knowing that if the storm returns I can call on His name and He will be there. Willing and ready to pick us up off the shore, rescue us from the waves, dry us off with His garment, and hold us close until He brings about His plan. I believe He is working in her life and in mine. I know He continues to strengthen my faith as I wait for my Ashley to be made whole. I am listening for His voice and to hear His command, "Peace, be still." I am trying. Thank you for your prayers and for your presence. Those of you who continue to jump in this boat with me day after day and ride out the storms are forever endeared to my heart. I am blessed by you. Trish