Feeling Yucky

Ash isn't feeling so good today. I'm not sure whats up with her, but we started our day with a huge amount of vomit that required a bath, a dressing change for her central line, and an ostomy change. She stayed awake all night and couldn't sleep. She was happy not fussy or uncomfortable, but had difficulty settling down to rest. Eventually I decided to just hang out with her and see what she would like to do. At 5:30 this morning I "tagged" Dave and he went to the girls room to take a turn(Allie had given up and gone to the couch around 3:00a.m.). At 7:00 Dave came and got me to try and help with the mess. She had yet to close her little eyes. She continued clapping, giggling, and playing through it all. We decided to stay awake and start the day. She practiced rolling over 5 or 6 times and then moved into the living room to play on her pallet. Around 9 she got really fussy and I just thought she was tired. I took her into the nursery for a nap. When I went back to check on her those puffy cheeks were very flush and had fever in them. She continues to rest but not peacefully. I am left wondering what is wrong. We had labs drawn yesterday and things seem to be fine. Her counts are still recovering from that last round of chemo, but they are inching closer and closer into range. I don't think she has an infection or anything. It just seems like she is feeling yucky this afternoon.


I'm feeling a little nervous just because of her central line and the fact that we did use it for her eye surgery last week. It is always possible to pick up a line infection when entering in and out of it, but I would expect her labs to have shown us something. Her eyes are still in the healing process, but I think they are looking better and better each day. I am going to wake her around 4 and try and get her to play for a while and see if she is interested in having a late lunch. Even when feeling yucky her sweet spirit shines through. She flashes that smile at me and it just melts my heart.

Its almost crunch time. I am busy planning(I can't tell you how many lists I have going) and packing for our trip. Only a few more days until our little gherkin will be 2 years old. I pray she is able to shake of the yucky feelings and will be able to enjoy her celebration. Your prayers for her today are so appreciated. Its tough to see her feeling bad when she has been doing so great. I just hope we figure it out so we can help her start to feel better.