Waiting

It seems as though I have been waiting for a lot of things lately. Tonight I find myself waiting on my family to arrive. As an adult I find it difficult to wait at times, so I can understand why my Allie has called 3 times in tears. She continues to call to let me know that their flight has been delayed. Again, and again, and yet again. She just wants to be here and she doesn't want to wait any longer. She had to talk to me because she was so sad about the delays but she told me she is not supposed to tell me that Blake is coming. He is going to surprise me. So I must act surprised to see him. I assured her that it would be ok and that I would be awake and waiting for her arrival. I told her of all the things we would do this weekend and then I told her we would begin planning for her birthday party and order the invitations tomorrow. Through her tears I could hear her smiling about that. It is never easy to wait. Especially when you have had your heart set on something.

Through my Ashley's Story I am learning to wait. A lot! One of the things I am finding out about waiting is that God's Best is always worth waiting for. We waited for 13 years for our Ashley and I am so very thankful that we were willing to wait on His best. I could not imagine our lives without her in it. We learned so much about waiting after being listed with the transplant registry. Each night we grew closer to God as we waited for the call to come. I never really thought that it would. I watched my Ashley begin to slip farther and farther away and I began to struggle with the wait. Every time the phone would ring my heart would beat out of my chest and I would hold my breath while waiting to see if it was the transplant center on the other line. When the call finally did come I could see that God had provided for our Ashley and our wait for organs was finally over. Now that she has been transplanted we wait for her to heal. I will be the first to admit that this is not an easy thing to do. I am constantly reminding myself that it will be worth the wait when He finally brings us to the point of leaving. Some days are harder than others, but I know that He is faithful and that when our wait is finally over we will be able to look back and see the hand of God all over our lives.

So tonight I continue my waiting. I am waiting on Dave and the kids to arrive safely here in Omaha.I am waiting to hug them until it hurts. I am waiting to hold his hand again. I am waiting to tuck them into bed tonight. I am waiting to place kisses on their foreheads. I am waiting for my Ashley to breathe on her own. I am waiting for her body to accept her feeds. I am waiting to take her out of the hospital and to our apartment. I am waiting for the day that we move home again. I am waiting to see her grow up. I am waiting to see who she will become. I am waiting to see her tell her story. I am waiting to see how much God will use her life for His glory. I don't know when the waiting will end for me, but I know that I want nothing less than His best and I am willing to wait on it. Good night from our room here in the PICU. Take care and God Bless. Trish